My apologies for not updating sooner. My phone is uncooperative and my Internet connection is wacky.

Here’s what I know: Marshall is “stable” and “looks good.” That’s just the team’s opinion.

He is my baby. He has been through hell and it shows.

The good news is things are progressing slowly but surely. And very very late last night Marshall gave us a sign he is fighting his way back to us.

Despite the sedation, the paralytic, and the ventilator, Marshall started breathing on his own last night just around midnight. As I was sitting bedside I noticed that a wave on the vent was different from the others. I immediately alerted his nurse. She tried clearing the machine by unhooking the vent, dumping the water, and then finally accepted he was taking breaths of his own.

But then she walked down the hall explaining in a circular discussion (when I pressed her to let him be) all of the reasons why he couldn’t continue to breath on his own. It was an (insignificant) and additional three to four breaths per minute. Yet she had to “make him stop doing that” with very powerful meds because “now isn’t the right time.” (Direct quote.)

EXCEPT Marshall told us it was time when he started breathing on his own…what irony.

Asking questions about it just to get more information didn’t uncover much. All I know is it is likely best he rests a while longer and he needs his chest closed before they can let him do the work.

So he is still on the vent, his chest is still open (though there is mention of closing as soon as he sheds more fluid), and they have him on a ton of medicine.

Though I know better than to expect anything, he recovered much differently from his first surgery than he is now.

But that surgery was not nearly as complicated.

I have to remind myself of the good stuff often: he is stable and he is in the best hospital he can be in. And he has the best team in the world. Just hours ago they took away one of the meds to see if he starts to breathe on his own a bit.

Pray hard/send big thoughts for the ventilator to go soon please. The ventilator is a necessary risk but the longer he stays on it, the potential for not so good stuff increases.

So here’s the plan I know of so far:

They are fiddling with meds to get the balance he needs to “Free the Pee” with the diureses.

They want to begin feeds today starting with I.V. nutrition followed by miniscule amounts of breastmilk. I tried to convince them to go straight for the breastmilk since it helped him thrive for 8 months ;-).

His super sensitive skin isn’t very happy between laying around and all of the meds. Though it doesn’t take much to cause a reaction, he seems to offer an inflammatory response to things he doesn’t like (sounds like his mom, eh??!)

What I know as his mom is he will hopefully soon be waking up screaming mad (as soon as they let him.) And hopefully HOPEFULLY by this time next week we can be packing up to get home to his brothers.

I miss all four of my boys so very much. It has been far too long since I have held any of them in my arms. And it goes against every cell in my body to have my boys spread over 300 miles apart.

So please, please, PLEASE just pray or send good thoughts or something strong to Marshall. I would give anything for forward progress, lots of freed pee, the chance to ditch some of these meds, they close his chest, that they pull the vent, and that we get to hold him by no later than Saturday morning.

Soooo. Many. Thanks.